Who was it that promised – give me five minutes with a man and I can tell you if he is broke or not.
T. Harv Eker, author of Secrets of the Millionaire Mind.
Oddly, I find myself thinking the exact same thing.
What comes out of the mouth of people usually would give you a hint of how they are doing financially. Yes, the Rolex, the expensive suit and the expensive cars only serve as smokes and mirrors – illusions that should not matter because it can be bought at credit (and at terrible cost). It is the words that a person spews that could give you a window to his financial soul – past, present, future.
There are words in a person’s vocabulary – five minute vocabulary – that would serve as the red flag to help your intuition. Words like: “I cannot”, “I am just poor”, “Money begets money”, “I have enough”, “I am okay”, “I do not deserve more”, “Poor me”, “Pity me”, “I hate the rich”, a string of complaints.
These can be divided into the following:
1. Lack of confidence/self-pity
2. Hatred or contempt for those who make it
3. Always complaining
4. Unyielding, unchanging, refusing to adapt (I will never change, why do I need to change?)
5. Refusal to acknowledge blessings
T. Harv Eker called this the millionaire mindset. Or for our purposes, lack of a millionaire mindset. But it goes far deeper, way into a person’s past. He said:
Our financial blueprints consist mainly of the “programming” we received in the past, especially as children. We aren’t born knowing anything about money; we were “taught” primarily through our family upbringing, but also through multiple cultural influences. We take this conditioning and run on it for the rest of our lives, even though we may not be aware of it.
This conditioning comes from:
1. What we heard when we were young
2. What we saw
3. What we experienced ourselves
If a phrase like “Rich people can’t be spiritual” is engrained into you, that subconscious, negative connotation will override actions any day, even if being rich is what you really want. We’re primarily creatures who act on emotion more than we act on reason, even though we’d like to believe the opposite.
So if we are emotionally conditioned to view money as something that will bring unhappiness, we are not going to think and act congruently to get more of it. This could come from a fear of not being loved based on a parent who believed rich people are somehow “bad,” or from seeing how someone who became wealthy attracted uncaring people who only wanted to take advantage of them; or from a direct experience where problems with money contributed to a troubled relationship.
And according to him, this is why the so-called instant millionaires return to penury after 5 years of winning: the circumstances changed and not the person. Not his money blueprint.
I must admit that for most of my life, I was contented with what was being given to me, denied my self-worth, thought I could not ask (must not ask) for more. I remember telling a boss (after he gave me a bonus) that I was very happy because I was actually getting more than what my peers were getting (what was I thinking?!!!). Imagine my shock when he “forgot” to give me a mandated increase. It was as if I conditioned him to think that I was okay, that I was happy, that I did not deserve more.
I was okay, wasn’t I?
But do not get me wrong. There is nothing wrong with happiness and contentment. Except if it is borne out of the idea that there is not enough to go around. The reality is that the universe wants us – needs us, deeds us – all of it. All.
Sometimes I still have a hard time talking to my mother about money because she believes – despite having an expensive house, successful children, a good paying job – that she is still poor. Dirt poor. Sometimes I guess the experience of poverty is so true and so deep and so powerful that no amount of words or good intentions or blessings can kiss it all away.
You. You have to look inside. What are you doing that is stopping you from getting all that you want and all that you can in this world?
What is your money blueprint?
Article by Issa. Art by D. Copyright 2009.
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