We could not wait for dawn to break through. But as it is , the night was still blanketed with stars.  But we were excited and could not sleep because of the excitement.  We have just painted our Easter eggs, my brothers and I, just a few hours ago.  We had 2 eggs each.  One [...]

At Christmas time, the mall is particularly stressful. I mean the crowds are massive and stifling, the parking is horrible, the merchandise is overpriced.

Christmas never used to be this way. It used to be special. The glittery, dreamy, new-clothes-new-shoes-lots-of-gifts-and-sparkles kiddy kind of special.

(Or is it because, then, I was not in charge (and not spending)?)

But I have grown up (as I must) and now it is my turn to make it special for my brood.

(And I wonder, was it stressful too for my mom and dad, or is it more stressful now because the world has become more fast-paced, more guilt-ridden, more material-focused?)

So ever since the countdown for Christmas began, I have been on the lookout for other alternative ways to give or buy gifts without breaking the bank or losing my sanity. Here are some of my picks:

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I read it from The Secret but it was Johannes “Meister” Eckhart who allegedly originally said this.

If the only prayer you said in your whole life was thank you…

I do not know who Eckhart is, except that he was a German theologian, philosopher and mystic born during the 12th century who wrote such controversial articles that he was tried as a heretic by the then-pope.

But this is not about Meister Eckhart or the Secret. This article is about certain prayers and thank you.

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It was midnight and my son started screaming like a banshee.

I mean, all of his 16 pounds-almost-five-month-old-body tensing, as he was screaming at the top of his lungs. Wanting my attention.

I read today that I should expect screaming from my 4-month old baby and that I should not worry – it is normal. That actually, screaming is harder for parents than it is for the babies. Theirs is just an outcry, no matter how desperate and agonizing-sounding it is. Their hearts are not broken. They are just manifesting the need to be held.

Wanting attention. Mine.

Because we were apart for almost 14 hours yesterday, courtesy of a Christmas party that I thought I needed to attend because I wanted to network and socialize.

My reaction to that cry was pain in my gut and unbearable guilt.

Because in the past, when he was just forming the first of his memories, he only needed to reach out his hand to me, or whimper, and I was there.

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A friend of my husband asked me how in the world I do not own any Louis Vuitton, Prada, Tod’s, Burberry or Chanel bag, the carry-on status symbol of choice for the modern woman.

I had to smile.

Okay. I have to admit that I am not immune to their charms. If anything, I love soft leather, and I certainly can appreciate wonderful craftsmanship. The ooohs and aaahs of the woman who realizes what it is is also a great incentive, I will not lie.

But I never really felt the urge to whip out my credit card so that I can have it in my arms, never been to the point of really considering buying, never felt for it that urgent fire that one gets when one wants something, and now. Really.

Because, internally, I could not justify its cost. I do not understand why in the world it would have to cost an arm and a leg, or why in the world I had to have it just because every one else has it.

(hubby said that women buy bags for other women – those who can appreciate it – and it is the wanting to be the envy of that other woman that drives many a woman into bankruptcy… i told him maybe it is the same for men, except for them, it is cars, or trophy mistresses)

I would rather put my money in the stockmarket, or invest it in a business, or …

Let’s do that again.

While I would put my money in the stockmarket, or invest it in a business, I will entertain the thought of travel too (say, 70 percent of the time).

Because show me pictures of faraway places – snow capped mountains, private villas with a butler (at half the price), lodges in deep brown and adorned with elk antlers, being massaged into oblivion, having a romantic candlelit dinner with only the white sand, sparkling and beautiful, and the lullaby of the sea for company – would spark a yes from me and I would play with money and dates in my head until I could justify going.

That is my thing.

I found out that my thing is the in thing now (post recession).

A New York Times article that said people are happier when they spend money on experiences rather than material things. If I can quote: New studies of consumption and happiness show, for instance, that people are happier when they spend money on experiences instead of material objects, when they relish what they plan to buy long before they buy it, and when they stop trying to outdo the Joneses….

If they are creating memories rather than just collecting stuff.

Experiences over possessions.

The article actually started with the story of a couple who went to the extreme of limiting their possessions to just 100 things and then giving everything else away (and in the process, eliminating their $30,000 debt).

Amazing.

That they found out the pleasure of owning do not last very long. But a trip, a night at the theatre, adult ballet lessons, sleeping in with the kids, a Saturday night dinner with the whole family, even though fraught with little fights or inconveniences or little mishaps, would seem rose-colored when looked at through the (thankfully) hazy veil of memory.

I do not want to say never because I do not know whether I will succumb to a designer bag the future (maybe when they invent a bag that can double as something else?). But having what I have, knowing what I know, and feeling what I feel, I am oddly glad too, in a way.

Article by Issa. Photo by Madelene Uyehara. Copyright 2010.
Website: www.YouWantToBeRich.com
Email: issa@youwanttoberich.com

The grand prize for the lottery soared to obscene heights and people again began to dream.

Of what it would be like to have money, lots of money, the future changed in a whim, through balls swimming in the air.

What would one do with it?

What one can do with it.

Of how it would change everything. Their lives, their past, their present.

And so they purchase their tickets day after day after day, as if through it they are manifesting their faith in the great unknown.

A chance of 1 in 20,872,566,000 – a chance that they are too willing to take. If statistics are to be believed, being struck by lighting (1 in 280,000) would appear to be easier.

Yet they take it. After all, you will not win if you will not roll the dice (or buy the ticket).

If you win, what would you do?

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I used to be a sponge.

I mean, I used to be interested in anything and everything and would ask my questions, however silly they are. I used to love to listen and would look with awe and wonder at the speaker, a sponge, taking in everything, what is being said, what is not being said, what I felt, what the speaker would want me to feel.

I used to be interested in stories and explanations and people.

But time intervened and with knowledge came… disinterest.

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I always wanted to set up a charity.

When my father died in 2003, I wanted to set up a charity for him. I could not explain the motivation. I just needed something to remember him by, for his name to remain and stand for something great and good. I looked at the website of my university and found out that for USD$1,000 per semester, I can do that. But it did not happen – it was probably because I did not have the support or the money I needed or I eventually talked myself out of it. But I had the strong desire to really do something like that and I often talked about it to my husband.

It is ironic because this year, we were the charity.

Let me explain.

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